Wednesday, July 2, 2014

A Table For Six

 A few weeks ago, we were all sitting at the kitchen table eating dinner and the kids started talking about how we have one extra seat at our table, our table seats six. My husband and I were explaining to them that we actually don't have any extra seats because soon Evan will be old enough and he will sit in the last seat. At which point, he and I started teasing that it was a good thing we didn't plan on having any more children because there was no more room at our kitchen table. All of this led to a great conversation about our kitchen table. 

Our kitchen table is EXTREMELY beat up and in poor condition. And it is not a top priority on the list of things we need because we've been in our home about eleven years now and so we have other items that are in more dire need of being replaced. For example, our carpet. Hmmm, the carpet is a whole other story. Anyways, we started talking about our table and I was telling my husband that maybe we wouldn't want to get rid of it. We were looking at all the scratches, white marks from where it's been burned, engraved pencil marks from kids doing homework, loose screws in chairs from kids leaning backwards in them, cushions with stains from numerous spills, and the list could go on.

Our kitchen table was one of the first purchases we bought after moving into our home. And it didn't cost us very much. We had our home built over eleven years ago and we were coming from a one bedroom 700 square foot condo. Needless to say, we had some furniture buying to do. We were reminuscing and telling the kids about how we used to eat at a plastic white patio table for our kitchen table. And I don't mean a nice patio set like most people have in their backyards. I mean the plain white cheesy plastic patio furniture that you could probably buy at Pic N Save (when there was Pic N Save). As we were telling our children the story of our kitchen table and I was looking at our ugly beat up table. I started to think maybe it wasn't so bad after all. There's a lot of history in this table and there's a lot more to come. Many important conversations and family dinners have been held around this piece of furniture.  Important table talk has been had there not only with my own children but with my sisters, my grandmother, my in-laws, and other important loved ones. It has been a place to gather and share stories and talk with one another. 

I think two revelations came out of all this silly table talk. One...sometimes the things that seem the most worn out or the things that have taken the hardest beating in our lives can actually be more valuable than we realize. These things can be invaluable and more purposeful than anything money can buy. And two, our table is finally full and that my friends is bittersweet. 

Most people assumed after our third child that we would not have any more children. We assumed that too but not because we didn't want any more children. That's a whole other long story. But most people who took the time to ask or knew my heart for our family knew that I always felt like someone was missing. Not something, SOMEONE. When we would go places I always felt like we were forgetting someone. I would count everyone to make sure they were all with us but still felt like someone was missing. I had heard so many other people talk about their family feeling "complete" when they brought their last baby home from the hospital and I didn't have that feeling after our third child. I so desperately wanted to have that feeling so that I wouldn't feel the emptiness that I continued to feel. And this was after having three children. I didn't understand when others would say they knew they were done with having children. I didn't know what that would feel like or look like.  And even at our beat up kitchen table it felt like someone was supposed to be there that wasn't. And although, if circumstances were different we probably would add one more  to our family (I know our families are probably gasping if they read this), I no longer feel like someone is missing. When we go places and I am making sure we're all together, I don't feel like I'm forgetting anyone or someone is not that there that should be. I can't say that our family feels totally complete and maybe that's because it's not. I'm sure there are many more people and children who are going to bless our lives in the future. But I can say that I feel quite content with my kitchen table having every last seat filled up......I truly do love my Table for Six.

Lots of Gingerbread houses have been made at this table!

Lots of green smoothies have been had at this table!

Lots of visitors have joined our kiddos at this table! Ha! Ha!

Grandparents have had many talks and played games with our children at this table.

Did you know? Artists are being born at this table!

The seats may all be taken but there are so many more memories, stories, and table talk that is waiting to happen!