Supermom & Her Cape

After two days of being home; I had packed lunches, made dinners, helped with homework, had a dentist apt, took the 3 year old to gymnastics, forgot to be the tooth fairy AGAIN,studied AWANA verses, went grocery shopping after reorganizing all my coupons, and paid bills. Guess you could say my mini vacation is over.  But what I've done in the past few days is only what all Supermoms do EVERY DAY.  In fact, I do less than most Supermoms I know in a given week. So you'd think we'd all be willing to hang up that cape any chance we get right? .......

Not most Supermoms I know. Just kind of got to thinking,  why do we hang onto that cape so tightly?

Last weekend, I attended a retreat with my sister. You could choose from a variety of workshops. I chose the perfect one just for HER! When I picked it, I was simply thinking of what I thought she needed.  I felt like God was going to speak directly to her heart on her busyness, how much she takes on, and so forth. Sigh......God's always going to blindside us when we allow ourselves to think we've got something under control.

The workshop was titled along the lines, " Superwoman, Take That Cape Off ".  The teacher was this amazing, sassy African American woman who had us laughing every few minutes as she spoke truth after truth. The first part was about why women feel that can't say no and the reasons that cause us to take on too much such as guilt, and pride.  She spoke of her own personal story on how she overextended herself and how it spiraled out of control. Now remember, this class was for my sister. As I sat there,  I was hearing the teacher and enjoying her lecture along with the class discussion. But my ears were not open. I was hearing but I was not listening.

You see, I had done the same thing this woman had done at one point in my life. And so as she went through everything, I just kept thinking; Yep, I've been there. I've learned these lessons already. I am able to say no. I am able to prioritize my time. I do not overextend or sign up for things or fill up my schedule with too many "extras" just because I feel like I should. I pray on things before I commit. I am a new person. Sigh....this was only a part of the lesson she was teaching.

Towards the end of my trip and when I got home, I realized my family was doing just fine without me. Things were just plugging along as normal and the husband was handling it all. The meals, the basketball games, the practices, bedtime battles, the sibling rivalry, and all the other things I usually handle when I'm wearing my Supercape. There was a tinge of disappointment that all had been under control.  But I had to search my heart as to why I felt this way and I couldn't quite pinpoint it.

Until I remembered,  what the sassy Superwoman workshop teacher had said.

She had said that sometimes we do not take off our cape or we take on all the responsibility because we think no one else can do it as well as we can. PRIDE........

After this light bulb moment, I could see myself  making the "list" for my husband. The "list" with drop off & pick up times, the multiple supplements & vitamins that they must take, what bills to mail, and the times & days for anything extracurricular. The grocery shopping I did so that my family would have food & meals planned for the 5 days I was gone. All of this created a lot of stress the few days before I left. Preparing everything to be done ......MY WAY.   When in reality, my husband went grocery shopping to make whatever meals he wanted and if none of those things on my list happened correctly.....all would have still been well.

Another reason given for wanting to "do everything" was the need to feel needed. That women desire to feel needed. Honestly, I am surprised this came to my mind later because at the time, I remember distinctively shrugging this one off completely. Thinking to myself that I do not do things to feel needed that was just simply silly. I was not one of those girls who needed self recognition or needed to be noticed for doing things. Hmmmm......but when I got home I think my feelings were a little hurt because I didn't feel needed. It didn't matter that I wasn't there to do those things, they didn't need me. All was well without Supermom. Dad was wearing the cape just fine.

Sometimes God just likes to whop us upside the head with character flaws, such as pride and insecurity. It's funny how those character traits can intertwine.  Anyways, when I got back I had to put that Supermom cape back on pretty fast. It has been an incredibly busy week. But do you know that I have had so much more patience, more energy, more love, and just more fun with my kids than I have in a long time? Amazing how a little break can help you feel so rejuvenated.

You see this is my theory. If us Supermoms choose to wear our cape ALL of the time. If we think that we are the only ones who can do it, believe our way is the best way, that things will fall apart, or we won't feel fulfilled or needed just because we take off our cape for a short while.... then our cape will become worn out. If we don't hang them up every once in awhile, our bright, shiny capes will become faded, tattered, and torn. How useful are we then? On the other hand, if we hang up that cape every once in awhile, give it to someone else to take care of, then it will stay better preserved and will be more useful to us when we put it back on.

Corny, I know. But I believe it to be truth.

Here are some pictures from my trip. My husband took awesome care of my cape and I'm back home ready to wear it again. And to my beautiful sister, I had the most amazing time. True sister time is always rejuvenation to the soul.

Getting ready to fly alone for the first time ever.

Mom and daughters getting a massage.

At our retreat, where they served wine!

My beautiful sister. She has the largest heart of anyone I know.

My forever momento. Sisterhood momento. And a daily reminder of my faith. Love!